Skip to main content

Featured Post

Honey Sunshine Chai Tea Warm Milk

Happy Birthday To You

Today is my mom's birthday. I sent her a little happy birthday video from me and David this morning and she hasn't replied yet. I just have to keep telling myself that she is busy because it's her birthday and she's probably out having a good time. I hope she is.
I have gifts I've been wanting to get her but finances are always tight. Maybe in two weeks I will finally be able to send out some nice things for her.

I wish she could see how big David is getting and he could show her that he's a big boy now and is starting to walk on his own. I wish I could hug her and take her out for her birthday. But what can ya do when your mom lives on the other side of the country?

Yesterday was my little brothers big 1-9 and we were able to FaceTime and it was amazing because I haven't seen him in two years and I finally was able to meet my niece for the very first time.

I miss my siblings more than ever. If I had the money I'd go up to Montana for a little visit right now.
That's the one thing about having such a diverse family. No one is ever in the same place.

My siblings usually come for the summers but now that both of my little brothers are daddies and my little sister is in a serious relationship, seeing them over the summer is much more complicated. And to be honest, sometimes I wish to myself that they don't come out at all just so I won't have to deal with the heartache and depression when they leave again.

Long distance family shit sucks major balls.

I'm just so glad that my therapy appointment is in two days. Hopefully by then I can release to you all, everything that's been going on and how I have been feeling. And hopefully without making a complete fool of myself.

Anyway, happy birthday to my mom. Happy birthday to my brother. Happy birthday to anyone else out there who's having a birthday today.

 Much Love,


Popular posts from this blog

Honey Sunshine Chai Tea Warm Milk

Last night I was watching my son sleep peacefully. The purple and orange Christmas lights hanging on the ceiling, shining down on his perfect, small, comfortable body; his small breaths; his little but strong chest moving up and then down. And I lie there with him, staring in wonder. A feeling of uneasiness settled in too. Worried. This little boy will continue to grow bigger and bigger, older and older, venturing out into the unknown. Staring down at his little neck that was openly tempting me to kiss it all over, not wanting to wake him. And I thought of his future girlfriend, or his wife, and thought: "How lucky she will be. THE luckiest girl in the world. To be able to kiss THAT neck. So passionately. Hold him dearly. Kiss him sweetly. Run her fingers through his hair. Caress his incredibly soft skin." And each time I thought these things, my tummy got warmer. My heart fluttered. Thinking of how he smells of honey and sunshine. Chai tea and warm milk. I realized th

A New Beginning

Hello World, I am back to the bloggerverse after a wild almost  three years time... I know, I know, I left without any real warning. I turned the site to private and didn't renew my domain, well honestly, because I didn't have anything to write. And more   honestly than that, I felt like I was not allowed to write anything. More on that in another post. 2017 was a whirlwind of complete chaos. There was SO much happening, I couldn't even begin to think of one simple thing to write about. 2017 was my rock-bottom. 2017 needed time to decompress. And if you couldn't tell from my latest posts in 2017 I was not in the best head-space. Luckily, life is very different now. Life feels A LOT lighter, even given the circumstances of the world today. Selfishly, I'd much rather be here in the year 2020 than have to go through 2017 again. But that's just me. Anyway, I wanted to come on here and play on the blog again. I will make a more detailed post about life in the next on

Sorry, I don't dance

It started with a bursting flame And ended with a knife hidden under the mattress A forbidden kiss that sealed our fate A fear that turned my blood cold He was filled with darkness Though he shone like porcelain Was this love, or possession? Was this fate, or trap? Did I stumble into his arms? Or did he place the wire? He was life and life was he Nothing else existed I danced around him forever Like the Moon dances around the Earth But he told me he didn't dance What a shame it is to put such strong legs To waste * * *